International Stress Awareness Week.

International Stress Awareness Week runs from the 2nd - 6th of November, and National Stress Awareness Day is the 4th of November.

So, here I am, writing about it. Because I should write about it, you know. I support businesses and individuals with all things mental health and emotional wellbeing. That’s my job!

You’ll see the irony in the fact that I didn’t want to write this because I am feeling really stressed at the moment.

I am at the point of stress, where everything is building up and when I take a breath and think “right, let me tackle this now” something goes wrong. Either a meeting gets cancelled, something goes wrong with the never ending house purchase pursuit, something around the house breaks, or I smack the car door into my top lip. I am at that point in feeling stressed where I dare to utter the words -

THIS IS ONE MORE THING IN A LONG LIST OF THINGS THAT HAS GONE WRONG FOR ME.

And that thinking lends itself to a lovely spiral of “why do bad things happen to good people. I don’t deserve this. Of course nothing good would happen to me. Someone give me a break!”

So, in deciding to write this blog post, I wanted to aim for authenticity. Honest blogging.

I used to be called a “drama queen”. Maybe I still am. I know that in my 20’s and some of my early 30’s if I felt an emotion I shouted it loud and proud, I shouted every feeling I had to anyone who would listen. I wore everything on my sleeve, I aired all my laundry - dirty and clean - to whoever wanted to see. Even people who didn’t want to see. I liked being a drama queen, it suited me.

Then, I started practising mindfulness. I started the basics of noticing my feelings and not really responding to them. Simply breathing as they pass. And my drama queen tendencies started to fade. And, using mindfulness, here is what I have learned about dealing with stress…

Stress can come from the way we deal with a situation. It is a part of how we respond to events happening around us. Adjusting our attitudes to situations can ease how we deal with stress.

It really is that simple. Am I good at this? Not really. I am trying, which helps. I try and add perspective to my stress. I try and see things as they are without attaching emotions to them or labels to them.

I also learned that there is a lot of ego involved in how we deal with stress. We believe that we cannot take time because we are too important, or people will think bad of us or we will be viewed as incompetent. And this is a learned response.

Right now I have a few phone calls to make, I have some odds and ends to tie up. But you know what? They can wait until tomorrow. Because I feel tired and my energy is low. And if I make the calls (and the outcome is less than favourable) I don’t have the energy to manage the outcome. But I know I will tomorrow morning. So I will make the calls then.

What can I do to manage any stress? Firstly I remind myself that all feelings are valid, and feeling stressed is a part of life sometimes. I have been stressed before and I will again. I then go to that mental list of things I know makes me feel better - walking the dog, watching TV shows, dancing to my favourite music, talking it out with my partner, being fully present with my family, writing a gratitude list (with my reasons why I am grateful for them) and last but by no means least - resting.

I know what to do because when I am not feeling stressed I make a list of the things I can do to make myself feel better.

So, that’s my post on stress. Let me know on my Insta page if you liked it! www.instagram.com/withlaurab