What we learn when we put ourselves first more…

I’ve been putting myself more intentionally for almost a year now, which feels kind of a thing - right?
We celebrate year anniversaries, birthdays, and so on - so it seems fitting to mention the things I have learned about myself since starting this.

1) I know myself more.
I am surer in my daily actions, in what I do, in WHY I do it. I feel more secure and grounded. I have trust in my opinions and ideas.

2) I people please less.
I used to say yes to everyone when they asked for help. Despite if I wanted to, or how I felt about it, I would say yes to them because I was the good girl who always helped. Talk about toxic positivity! Good girls are the girls who everyone likes, so do as much good stiff for others and they will like you. My worth was heavily tied into the nice things I did for people. This doesn’t mean I am not nice - but I do things that FEEL GOOD for both parties.

3) I seek validation from others less.
Not totally, but LESS. To stop that totally would be some big thing, but if I am in a room full of people it’s no longer my sole purpose to have them all like me. I’m good as I am thanks.

4) I walk away.
When I realize something isn’t for me, I walk away. Of course, I fulfill my obligations, but I can easily and calmly walk away from it.

5) My relationships with people became stronger.
Knowing myself more means I can know more about others. My core relationships have flourished. FLOURISHED. I’m close to my husband because we talk more about the “hard to talk about stuff”. I’m more patient with my children so we’re closer. And I value my friendships deeper because I SEE THEN instead of need them for validation.

That’s five huge things. HUGE.

If you think you could benefit from putting yourself first more but are unsure where to start - you know where I am.

L xx