Anxiety Over Finances
I have been hearing, everywhere, the stress and serious anxiety that people are having over money - and so I wanted to write something to hopefully add to the ease of this anxiety.
Let me start this by saying, no article, no words I, or others can write can fix the issue, the issue is deeply systemic. Everyone should have the right to food, shelter, heating, electricity and water. Not to mention everyone’s right to rest, joy and kindness. This is something small I believe I can offer to anyone who is anxious about money.
Worry about money is very real, and very stressful. Believe me, I have been there. The more we worry, the less able we are to manage the situations, to look at our finances, and to deal with the anxiety over it we have. I am no money expert (if you run your own business, see Ray Dodd for all your money coaching needs), but I am pretty damn good at at helping you with anxiety. So let’s go.
One of the biggest anxiety spirals we can get into is that of avoidance, we can avoid the post, avoid the bills, avoid thinking about it all. This gives us a small and temporary relief, but by avoiding the issue we create a bigger issue which leads to bigger worries. So my first tip -
TALK TO SOMEONE.
I know, this is hard. But talking about it to someone is the first step in easing worries. As someone as makes a living from allowing people to have the space to freely talk about their thoughts, with no judgement, I KNOW this works. Find the right someone - the person who will be there as a support, in a gentle way, and then carve out some time where you can speak freely and honestly. Then you can move to point 2 -
MAKE A PLAN
Again, simple yet so effective. Make a plan of what you can do, and with the help of the person above, make the calls. Action the plan. Check in with the plan regularly. Make sure you’re talking about your feelings and thoughts with someone regularly. This may be hard at times because our fear gets in the way, we can feel so much shame around money issues, so this next point is something we cannot miss…
UNDERSTANDING SHAME
Shame is a powerful and painful and a feeling we never really get taught to understand or manage. So, here are some tips on shame. Sit with the feeling. Yes, it’s painful and uncomfortable and nasty, but sitting in the feeling allows you to learn more about your specific response to shame. Forgive yourself for any mistakes you made, you’re a human, humans make mistakes. Yes, even huge massive ones. Forgive yourself for those mistakes. Talk to someone about the shame, as much as you can. Understand that this is one small part of you, not the whole you. This does not define you.
Okay, this is a huge topic to chat about for a Wednesday - and that’s okay! We can do hard things on Wednesdays too.
If you need me, you can contact me here or email hello@withlaurab.com.
Until next time,. L xx
